Coping emotionally with redundancy
Having trouble coping with redundancy?Facing the prospect of redundancy, living through the process and the aftermath can take a huge toll on you emotionally. You might feel anxious, angry, fearful, tearful, a sense of shame or relief. Some people say it's like being punched and pummeled by some unexpected and invisible force. Even laid back and self contained people can experience emotions that are strange and unsettling and they have no experience of dealing with. So, learning how to cope with the emotional stresses and strains that come with letting go of the old and ushering in the new is an essential part of building your new life. As a key change stimulus in our lives, being made redundant and losing your job, and maybe other things like it meaning you have to move house or location and putting a strain on relationships at home, can closely mirror the symptoms of grief.
Understanding this process, recognising that it is quite normal, and accepting that it affects everyone can help us to manage our own feelings better. It also gives us valuable empathy and insight into the feelings of others around us too.
The process of grief - where are you now?
- How quickly we move through the stages depends on our individual circumstances but the six stages are quite distinct.
- Sometimes these are given slightly different labels but essentially they are: shock, denial, anger/resistance, acceptance, exploration & challenge.
- We don't move through these stages like a straight line by the way. It's quite common to have little relapses just when we think all is going well. A knock back like being rejected for a new job can bruise us all over again, so be easy on yourself.
Stage 1 - Shock In a similar style to a grief reaction, people may take some time to address the reality of what has just occurred. You can't really do much at this stage but come to grips with what the new situation entails.
Stage 2 - Denial A common reaction may be to deny the impact of the redundancy "This isn't (or can't) be happening to me!"
Stage 3 – Anger/Resistance It is important to openly deal with what angers us. "Why did this have to happen to me?" Anger de-skills us but it can create a mood of self-preservation. This may promote risk avoidance and hold back the innovation you need to build your new life.
Stage 4 - Acceptance The commencement of accepting that the way things are done has indeed changed and that the old ways are in fact gone. "I suppose if I have to deal with this, I might as well get on with it"
Stage 5 - Exploration A willingness to look at options to move forward from redundancy. "How do I actually go forward from here?" The point at which you might start look at re-training, find a new job, thinking of setting up your own business.
Stage 6 - Challenge Actually moving forward. This where it is important that the change process is a catalyst for a positive outlook and not just there as an obstacle to moving on to your new life.
It's good to talk
- Sometimes if we can't or don't want to talk to people we know about our feelings and anxieties, we need to talk to someone independent. Sometimes we might have confided just a bit too much in our friends 'Mr Walker' and 'Mr Smirnoff'.
- The organisations listed below can, and do, provide a valuable lifeline to thousands of people.
- Many people report that engaging in some form of sport or exercise especially running and swimming helps to keep us fit but also to release our 'feel good' hormones. It keeps us on the straight and narrow road to recovery, and depression at bay. Being busy in a constructive way enables the healing process - have a look at the managing your time effectively section too.
- There's lots more advice and help in our book "Rebuilding your life after redundancy" - you can order your copy directly from the publishers for £10.99 plus p&p here.
Key Support Organisations
- The Samaritans Charitable organisation founded in 1953 by Chad Varah to help those in emotional need in complete confidence, telephone 08457 90 90 90 (local call rate)
- Alcoholics Anonymous Helps those in need to deal with alcohol addiction
- Drinkline - offers advice, information and support to anyone concerned about their own or someone else's drinking
Freefone 0800 917 8282 - National Drugs Helpline 24-hour helpline for drug users, their friends and families Freefone 0800 77 66 00
- National Debtline - help for anyone in debt or concerned they may fall into debt Call free on 0808 808 4000
 |
Chapter 3 Coping emotionally with redundancy and change.pdf - 122kb Download this file |
| Subscribe now - keep up to date by email with the latest career news, events and new site content! |
"Energy and persistence conquer all things." Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790) |